Tuesday, December 16, 2003

Bah! Humbug!

Dear Dave

I'm utterly utterly depressed, to the point of bawling my eyes out on the underground last night for no reason and then turning up at a friends house for a hug and then leaving shortly after despite kind offers of food and company. I know when I get this bad it's just temporary and will pass. Should I just say 'fuck Christmas' and buy some ridiculously high heeled shoes. Also, despite telling la Mutha that I won't be home for Christmas, she's now putting the emotional screws on me. Should I just say 'fuck Christmas' and lay on my sofa all Christmas day eating Twiglets and ignoring the phone.

Yours, Un-Noel

Dear Un-Noel,

My, you are down at the moment, aren't you? You should be wary of quick fixes like buying shoes. While they may bring temporary relief from the depression, they won't solve the problem and it will come back to haunt you eventually. You need to work out what's really upsetting you and deal with it. Once you have done that you can say 'fuck Christmas' with impunity, because you'll know it's what you really want, rather than just some knee-jerk reaction to something else entirely.

One thing, though. Twiglets? All day? I mean, they're nice enough but after a handful or so they become a bit sickly. Intersperse with peanuts, cheese straws and pork scratchings and you'll be fine.

Hope this helps. Remember, you'll always have friends here in blogland.


P.S. I think BW has a solution to the la Mutha problem in a comments box below.

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